Navigating Tryouts. Perspectives for Parents & Athletes

As a hockey parent, I've learned that tryouts test more than just our kids — they test us, too.

Whether your children are still in the process or already know where they landed, they're looking to us for how we listen, guide, and show up in moments of triumph and disappointment.

Ask them directly: “How can I support you?”

They may not even want you at their tryouts. They may just need space, a listening ear, or ideas for moving forward.

Acknowledge what you hear and honor it.

And if they're open to reframing, here are a nuggets to use as appropriate:

•  Control what you can: preparation, effort, attitude, resilience. Let go of outcomes.

•  Your sport doesn’t define you. Who you are as a person is far greater than hockey - or any sport.

•  You’re not a letter or #. AA, A, B1, B2, C—none of these measure the magnitude of your purpose, your heart or your character.

•  Progress > perfection. We aren't meant for perfection. Look at how far you've come, not flawless performance.

•  Life is 50/50. Don’t just welcome the highs—learn to value the lessons hidden in the lows.

•  Things happen for you, not to you. This moment is part of your bigger story. Approach it with curiosity and look for the meaning.

•  Give yourself grace. You've worked hard. Acknowledge that and take some time to process.

•  You’re not alone. Teammates and friends are on the same journey. Be there for them.

•  Be humble and grateful. No matter the outcome, this attitude matters most now, and in life.

•  A setback isn’t a place to stay. Feel it, learn from it, then get moving forward.

For our family, prayer is part of the process. We’ve found that we’re better, stronger and more resilient when aligned with God.

Bottom line: It's their story, not ours. We can't write it for them, but we can stand beside them and support them as they grow, stumble, and rise again.

PS – I'm no expert in parenting or tryouts, but I do have passion for helping people navigate transitions such as this with purpose, and thought I'd start a conversation.

I'd like to open it up to you. What has your family been tested by and learned from during tryout season? Please email your response to: laura@expandyourpossibilities.net.