In his first district playoff hockey game last night, my 12-year-old goalie didn't just want to win against their big rival—he wanted a shutout.
By the final period, both goals seemed within reach. His team was up 4-0, and a flawless victory was in sight. But with just 22 seconds left, the opponent took a shot that hit the far post — score! Final score: 4-1.
While you'd think he'd be thrilled with the win, his mind was stuck on the one goal he didn't stop.
Instead of celebrating the 15 saves he made, he fixated on the one that got through—the 6% that went wrong overshadowed the 94% that went right. And that single moment consumed his emotions for the rest of the evening.
Sound familiar?
I'm using my son's story because we all do this. When setbacks happen, our brains often zoom in on what we could've done better, instead of everything that went right.
So, how do we overcome this mindset?
✅ Feel your feelings.
It's okay to feel disappointed—it means you care. Don't stuff those emotions down. What you resist tends to persist.
✅ Reframe the narrative.
When frustration lingers, ask yourself:
What progress did I make?
What went better than expected?
What positive feedback did I receive?
What did I learn?
✅ Embrace imperfection.
We're all works in progress, and no human is perfect. If you know you did your best, focus on progress over perfection—always.
Setbacks are part of the game—whether on the ice, at work or in life.
👉 What strategies help you bounce back from setbacks?
I'd love to hear your thoughts.
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